Five Unwritten Rules of University Dating | Top Universities

Five Unwritten Rules of University Dating

By Vickie Chiu

Updated February 3, 2016 Updated February 3, 2016

University can be a confusing time. Not only are you expected to learn and soak up a mound of  new information for your degree, make new friends as well as try out new crazy things, there’s also a good chance that you’ll be distracted at times…

Whilst I do not claim to have any expertise on the dating etiquette in all corners of the world, from speaking with my fellow peers (who will remain anonymous to spare any red faces ), I’ve identified some universal truths when it comes to university dating which could potentially keep any heartache or humiliation to a minimum.

(See also: Five scary things they don't tell you about university.)

1) One intimate moment does not a serious couple make

You had an AMAZING night, it was pure magic, you’re totally on the same page as each other on absolutely everything. A word of warning about university dating. Even if this is so, try to refrain from changing your Facebook status to “in a relationship” straight after your romantic encounter. Make sure the other person(s!) agree with your point of view first, otherwise you might be left cyber rejected (ouch!)

2)  ”Having a thing” , “Seeing each other”,  ”Hanging out”, “Not seeing anyone else though” all mean “Not in an actual relationship yet”

Sounds harsh, but until there is unambiguous mutual declaration or agreement of official relationship status between both parties, you are not in an actual relationship. So take it easy, don’t pour your heart and soul into this pseudo relationship yet. As far as the other person is concerned, you’re both still entitled to play the field a little.

3)  ”I’ll see you around in the canteen” does not mean you have a second “date”

Sorry babe, I’m sure you’re hot stuff and all, but don’t spend your time and effort stalking them in the canteen the next day. Any variation of “I’ll see you around in the canteen/library/lecture hall” in university dating just means “That was fun, but I have no intention of seeing you again”, or the more popular “He/she’s just not that into you“. Move on!

4) Don’t expect to be wined and dined

Most students will be on a bit of a tight budget with 70% of that budget allocated to beer. If you’re going to be “hanging out”, ladies, don’t be surprised if you’re subtly asked if you could split the bill.

5) All’s fair in (university) love and war

Finally, with university dating, rules and even common decency can go completely out the door. Don’t be disheartened. Expect the unexpected and be prepared to go to war should anyone decide to be reckless with your heart - see these wise words from Baz Luhrmann (awwwww).

P.S. In five years’ time, you probably won’t remember the person’s name, so don’t let them take up your precious head space!

This article was originally published in November 2012 . It was last updated in February 2016

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